Adult Education

 

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Today’s photo is courtesy of Claire Sheldon.  Thanks, Claire.  It reminds me of homework and school days.

When this story first appeared in its original form on May 21, 2014, it became, and remains, my most commented-on posting.  Let’s see if lightning strikes twice.

First, read the story, then click on the link below it.  It is based on a news story my former station ran.  You’ll get to see American local TV and the two wonderful people I worked with.

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Laura put her arms around Mike’s neck and kissed it.

She cooed.“Whatcha thinkin’ about, baby?”

Mike struggled with the words. “You, me, those sensational nights together.  I think you can guess the rest.”

She stiffened.  “You’re in love with me?”

He nodded. “OK.  So, this wasn’t in our agreement, but …”

She pushed herself away. “No, Mike! I am graduating this semester.  Don’t screw up a good thing.”

Mike saw in her eyes that it was over.

He wrote a check with ones and many zeroes for her final college semester and handed it to her. “You could do worse.”

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Looking inside the dating world of Sugar Daddies and Sugar Babies

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Sheitel*

COMING SOON — My first long-form story in serialized editions will be presented in the coming year.  Please look for it on this blog.  I’ll let you know when.

Since this is “Rochelle Week” with the pic, and a good one at that, I, too, have some of my own memories of that great Land to the East.  So, now MY contribution.

The following first appeared November 13, 2013.  The story title’s meaning is at the bottom of the story itself.

It’s always a great thing to poke a little fun at culture.  To wit —

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I spoke my best Hebrew to the passerby.  “Chaim Glicksman.  Where is he?”

The passerby answered in English.  “Down that way.  Christian Quarter.”

Chaim saw me right in the street.  “Shalom, my friend!”

I shook his hand.  “Chaim, what’s a nice Orthodox boy like you doing in the Christian Quarter?”

“Not every Jew is an Israeli, not every Israeli a Jew.”

“How is Ayelet?”

“My wife is fine, although we suffered a loss recently.  My daughter lit a candle and accidentally set Ayelet’s hair on fire.”

“That’s terrible!  Is Ayelet all right?”

“Of COURSE.  She wasn’t home at the time.”

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*wig

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A Slow News Day?

 

Ted Strutz on the Ferry in the rain.jpgUnfortunately in the news business, sometimes the reporters “become” the news with tragic results.  Reporter Kelly and Engineer Dan found this out on a live shot … almost.

This story first appeared in its original form June 26, 2013.  It has been re-written.

Photojournalist is Ted Strutz with his amazing picture.  Ted, you keep us going on slow days.

Stand by … in three … two … one …

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Sparks flew overhead.

“Kelly!  Don’t!!!”

“I gotta get OUT of here!”

“A live wire’s tangled in the mast.  Truck’s electrified!  Step out and you’re DEAD!”

“Dan, that pole’s gonna crash down any second!”

“Listen, Kelly.  Put both feet together, OK?  Jump out, LAND on them together.  Then, take TINY baby steps toward me.”

Kelly held her breath and jumped onto the pavement.  Ten baby steps later, she fell into Dan’s arms. The pole fell, the truck exploded in flames.

“You OK?”

Kelly puffed.  “Fine.”

Dan shrugged, nervously chuckling.  “Guess we thumb a ride and declare a slow news day, huh?”

 

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Nerds Unlimited

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This fun pic is being brought to you by the “Dale-ectable” Dale Rogerson.  Thank-you, Dale.  I can’t wait to see you serving up that chicken soup you promised me and je préviens de vous voir porter aussi votre costume de femme de chambre. 

 

OK, so, you’re getting a re-run.  This story first appeared March 12, 2016.

The title has nothing to do with the story, yet it does.  It has more to do with the reader of it, maybe even the author.  We’ll see.

Dedicated to all our British friends.

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They always traveled together, so Steve felt it was the time to make the play.  He turned his chair, looked her in the face.

“Listen, we’ve been doing this for a long time now and I just want you to know I’m very fond of you.”  The rest of the speech seemed to work, until he started to sing the most “romantic” song he could think of.

“My heart would be a fireball, a fireball if you would be my Venus of the sta-a-ars.”

Venus stared at him with disdain.  “Forget it, Zodiac.  I have a pulled neck string.”

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Enjoy the Fireball XL5 theme song!

 

 

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Fandom … And Who Needs It?

Well, hello again, folks!  Yes, it’s been awhile.  Why?  Because I have been busy getting my house in order.  At the young age I am, I am officially … retired!

Yes, retired.  I have joined the ranks of that great bunch of people whose time is now their own.  Also, I am working on a rather long and involved story that will knock your socks off.  The research has been the time spent away from the distinctive “wmqcolby” blog.  As soon as it’s ready, it will be serialized here.

Now then …

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The wonderful Sarah Potter kindly consented for us the use of this picture of hers.  Thanks, Sarah!

Ever wonder what REALLY goes on in the minds of actors and the memorable roles they played? Maybe this …

 

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Here it comes … THE question.

“How did you get the role of Jim on Islands To The Stars?”

He had to ask, huh?  “I was a contract player at the studio.”

“How many conventions does this make for you now?”

What do I say … I was a Shakespearean actor, now I make money doing this?  “I’ve lost count.”

“Do you keep in contact …?”

“No.  It was another job to me.”

He laughed.  “Kind of mind-blowing after fifty years, huh?”

What do I say?  I hated the show, the cast and the producer an idiot?  He sighed. “Yeah … mind-blowing.”

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Ex-speeding The Seed Limit

My fantasy has arrived.  It falls under the file of What We REALLY Wish We Could See On TV News.

Queen Rochelle furnished the picture … which I might say is AWESOME!   I wish I had a better, more inspirational a story for it!  Maybe next time.

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Morning reporter Kathy Owens arrived at the burning house first, set up for her live shot  and waited.  Two minutes later, she was on the air.

“Dan, Cecily, the house here on Chestnut, we’re being told, was caused by a fire in the basement.  1000 pounds of marijuana hidden down there, according to police, caused it.”

Anchorman Dan replied. “Any injuries, Kathy?”

“So far, none, Dan, although this neighborhood was thick with smoke so they all evacuated fast.”

Anchorwoman Cecily chimed in.  “You know where they went?”

Kathy smelled the smoke and started giggling, then more. “They’re … at … TACO BELL!”

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And the FF Jester strikes again.  Oh, SNAP!

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Send More Chuck Berry!

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Sarah Potter gave us this photo.  Thanks, Sarah.

I had NO idea what this was (which goes to show you NEVER wake up at 4 AM to see what the prompt of the week is — you’ll get confused).

Then, again, it isn’t what you’re looking at, either.  Same for the story.  It first appeared on March 26th, 2014.  Have at!

 

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The two boys couldn’t wait to run out to the woods near the neighborhood.

“I’ll be Kyle and you’ll be Derrick and our spaceship just crashed here.”

“Right. We can pretend to build a campfire.” They stacked sticks and twigs.

Their moms stepped outside the house. “Time to come in now, boys! You can continue this tomorrow.”

The boys’ mothers looked at each other. “Hmm. Since that thing crashed-landed, every kid is playing spaceman.”

Holding the newspaper, the other mom opened it to the headline. “Oh, look. There’s more news on it.  You think they decoded those symbols yet?”

headlines

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Title explanation: when they sent the Voyager up, they sent a record called The Sounds of Earth.  On it were all the recorded sounds of language, animals and music of the world. This included the Chuck Berry song, “Johnny B. Goode.”  On Saturday Night Live (an American TV satirical comedy program, for those outside the States), they did a news sketch where they reported the Voyager probe had been found by aliens and the aliens listened to the record and sent a message back, “Send More Chuck Berry!” Image

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